Are we ‘cultivating an online evangelical culture of self-projection. Trying our hardest, of course, not to look like we’re self-promoting. This is not where God’s power lies.’

Dan Ortland asks some hard questions about our use of Social Media.

At a superficial level we are tempted to think of it in terms of a fear of the moment of death itself. Perhaps the last few weeks of a terminal disease or the moments on board a plane as it plummets to the ground after a major malfunction. It’s this kind of fear of death that made Woody Allen quip  ’I’m not afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.’

So when we think of the fear of death we tend to reduce it to the fear of dying. But I’m not sure that does it justice. I want to argue that the fear of death is a much bigger idea that pervades more of life. It’s better expressed in another quote this time of Leo Tolstoy who said

My question – that which at the age of fifty brought me to the verge of suicide – was the simplest of questions, lying in the soul of every man … a question without an answer to which one cannot live. It was: ‘What will come of what I am doing today or tomorrow? What will come of my whole life? Why should I live, why wish for anything, or do anything?’ It can also be expressed thus: Is there any meaning in my life that the inevitable death awaiting me does not destroy.

To the secularist the vague notion that maybe we actually live on in the afterlife has been rejected. So what hope now? Well we find the fear of death at work in surprising ways. In the vain hope that we can continue to be present, if not in reality, then through a computer programme that interacts on Facebook, etc., on our behalf. That, if you like, pretends that we have not gone forever.

So here we find the fear of death expressed in surprising ways as exemplified in this TED talk  by Adam Ostrow entitled  After your final status update

The fear of death is seen in increasingly desperate attempts to hold onto life. In our unwillingness to  leave this life.

How do we respond as Christians?

It’s easy to want to laugh, maybe it all makes us want to cry but surely it reminds us that our message of the one who has defeated death and promised life to all who are in him is a message every human soul is primed to need to hear.

The writer of Ecclesiastes says in chapter 3:10-11

I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart

It is that burden we see expressed in the world and it is that burden that only the gospel answers. Peter in his first letter writes;

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you

Let us then be bold to continue to speak of him who alone has beaten death and conquered the grave.  The one who alone has the answer to the fear of death however it might reveal itself.

Bill Keller, Executive editor of the Times, declares himself to be no luddite but in a week in which he introduced his 13 year old daughter to Facebook he writes of the unforeseen, unintended consequences of pursuing digital technology;

‘My inner worrywart wonders whether the new technologies overtaking us may be eroding characteristics that are essentially human: our ability to reflect, our pursuit of meaning, genuine empathy, a sense of community connected by something deeper than snark or political affinity.’

‘The shortcomings of social media would not bother me awfully if I did not suspect that Facebook friendship and Twitter chatter are displacing real rapport and real conversation, just as Gutenberg’s device displaced remembering. The things we may be unlearning, tweet by tweet — complexity, acuity, patience, wisdom, intimacy — are things that matter.’

The conclusion of the study is that we feel anxious and even depressed whenever we compare ourselves with others because we almost always think that our facebook friends are doing better in life than we are. There is nothing new in those feelings but maybe Facebook exacerbates the problem because it suggests that everyone else out there is leading the perfect life.

Brian Houston makes us sad

Of course there is a Christian version of this. At the extreme end of it is the health and wealth message of men such as Brian Houston of Hillsong Church.

Houston’s book You need more money: Discovering God’s amazing financial plan for your life could only be written by a rich Western Christian. I would love to hear him try to persuade the persecuted Christians in various Islamic countries that God has a purpose to bless them financially and make them rich in this life!

Here’s a taster:

If you are applying the Word to your life, God will bless you with prosperity and good success.

And then again:

Take a bit of time to think this through and if you still aren’t sure that God wants you to prosper, ask yourself these questions:

If God didn’t want you to get wealth, why would he give you the power to get it?

If He didn’t want you to be wealthy, why would He take pleasure when His people prosper?

And why would He promise prosperity and success if He preferred us to remain poor?

Or how about this under a section headed ‘Get comfortable around money’

It is time to relax and become confortable around money. You need to stretch yourself and position yourself right out of your comfort zone.

For example. it may involve a little exercise like putting on your best clothers and ordering coffee in  a fancy restaurant or hotel lobby. Even though you could make the coffee for half the price at home, the total experience may enlarge your thinking. You may even feel better about yourself and life.

Now not only is this simply unbiblical and dishonours all those who have suffered great loss for the sake of Christ (has this man even read Hebrews 11?) but it is a dangerous teaching which also has devastating pastoral consequences. What message does it communicate to those who are struggling to find work, or to the retired wondering whether they can put the heating on as they try to make ends meet on a state-pension. What message to the single mum struggling to raise her children because her adulterous husband walked out of the marriage for another woman? What message to the church in parts of Africa or Asia who face economic disadvantage and discrimination because of their faith?

Such teaching is a million miles away from the Bible and has the effect of making those Christians who are sold such nonsense deeply sad because the only logical consequence of Houston’s argument is that they are missing out on a promised blessing in this life either because of disobedience, a lack of faith or a God who has chosen to withold his promised blessing from one person but not another for reasons no-one can fathom.

The gospel that rejoices in sadness

On Sunday  I am teaching on Matthew chapter 5 in which Jesus says not blessed are the rich but rather:

Blessed are those who mourn, who are meek, who are persecuted because of righteousness. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.

Why can Jesus say such things?

v.12 Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.

It’s not just facebook that may make us sad as Christians, it is life in a fallen world and life in which we suffer loss for Christ’s sake. But we have a sure and certain hope because we have received a great promise from King Jesus – great is your reward in heaven.

Russel Moore makes a broader point in his challenge to the church;

Our most “successful” pastors and church leaders know how to smile broadly. Some of them are blow-dried and cuff-linked; some of them are grunged up and scruffy. But they are here to get us “excited” about “what God is doing in our church.”

Our worship songs are typically celebrative, in both lyrical content and musical expression. In the last generation, a mournful song about crucifixion was pepped up with a jingly-sounding chorus, “It was there by faith I received my sight, and now I am happy all the day!”

And he challenges us to face up to our sadness whilst we wait for the coming of our King who in his time will wipe away every tear from our eye. Russel Moore again;

By not speaking, where the Bible speaks, to the full range of human emotion—including loneliness, guilt, desolation, anger, fear, desperation—we only leave our people there, wondering why they just can’t be “Christian” enough to smile through it all.

The gospel speaks a different word though. Jesus says, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” (Matt. 5:4). In the kingdom, we receive comfort in a very different way than we’re taught to in American culture. We receive comfort not by, on the one hand, whining in our sense of entitlement or, on the other hand, pretending as though we’re happy. We are comforted when we see our sin, our brokenness, our desperate circumstances, and we grieve, we weep, we cry out for deliverance.

True friendship consists not in the multitude of friends, but in their worth and value – Ben Johnson

A man of many companions may come to ruin,but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother - Proverbs 18:24

Where God gives us opportunity let us be true friends today.

Don’t waste your life.

Procrastination. How much time is eaten up when we could be getting on with doing other, better things. Work, praying, hanging out with ‘real’ people.
Ill-discipline. How easy is it to stay up late into the night messing around – ‘just one more click’ we say to ourselves – even when friends have gone to bed we can continue ‘virtual friendships’.
Poor priorities. Fifty percent of Facebook users visit the site every day. I wonder whether even fifty percent of Christians read their Bible and pray every day. C.f. Psalm 1.
Addiction. As human beings we have sinful natures that are prone to addictive weaknesses. The very nature of certain technologies may make them harder to resist. Internet has constant novelty and constant access. Here is how one journalist put it:
‘I’m all but surgically attached to the web. I’m working 24/7, and increasingly isolated from social interaction. Going to the Atlantic offices helps, but getting a grip on this thing is hard.’

Maturity

Facebook is focused around younger people who have most to learn in being godly and controlled in their use of technology. Bad habits develop early and are then harder to kick.

Relationships

Flirting. I may not think of it as such but might my behaviour towards the opposite sex become a way to lead them on? Maybe the pictures I post at the very least might be unhelpful to them? Do I use Facebook to check-out people I might be interested in dating but then that lead to unhealthy thoughts, even lust?
Projecting an image. Do I use Facebook to re-create myself. To show off by projecting a false me, a new ‘me’ that people wouldn’t recognise if they really knew me.
Inappropriate intimacy? Why should I view photobooks of people I hardly know? What is the point of a ‘wall’ on which private remarks become public comment?
Saying things we might regret. It’s easy to type a few words in a status bar that easily offend. Even Bishops do it . (link)
Public exclusion. Everyone knows who and who are not ‘friends’ or who’s not been invited to the event, etc.

Virtue of humility

Narcissism. If the heart of sin is as Luther says ‘Life turned in ourselves’ then Facebook is the perfect platform for sin. How easy it is to use Facebook as a place to promote ourselves and how many friends we have and what a great time we’re having. Facebook is a way of saying ‘look at me’ everybody.
CS Lewis says ‘Christian humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less’. Using Facebook to promote Christian humility is a challenge for all of us.

Celebration of trivial and superficial

Superficiality. It’s not easy to say anything meaningful on Facebook. Such platforms don’t seem to be a good forum for in-depth heart-to-heart talks or extended discussion or discourse. If this is my primary means of relating will a shallow culture turn me into a shallow culture – Nicholas Carr seems to think so. As a culture we don’t know how to relate intimately. Deep intimacy is avoided. We prefer superficial and even anonymous relationships.
Lack of accountability. How easy to invest energy in lots of superficial friendships and fail to develop a few good friendships. The danger is of hiding behind superficiality which might be enough in the happy student bubble but is disastrous for a whole life lived for God.

The very way it weakens our thinking

‘The blogging mind does not easily adjust to reading a book or allowing an unformed thought stay unformed. Even when you carve out time for more offline reading or living, it’s hard to switch gears. And the danger of burnout is serious.’ Andrew Sullivan, ‘A Blog Sabbath?’
I’ll leave the last word to Don Carson:
‘Scarcely less important than speed of access is the Internet’s sheer intoxicating addictiveness—or, more broadly, we might be better to think of the intoxicating addictiveness of the entire digital world. Many are those who are never quiet, alone, and reflective, who never read material that demands reflection and imagination.’

From the printing press to the invention of the internal combustion engine,TV, Personal Computer, Mobile Phone, every culture has had to adapt and adjust to new technology. Maybe you enjoyed watching the Butler struggling to come to terms with the introduction of the telephone in the final episode of ITV’s Downtown Abbey.

Technology often receives one of two reactions either uncritical reception or retreat. I’d like to advocate a third. Perhaps the more biblical position is to recognise that each new technology offers an opportunity: Redemption. Paul put it like this;

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. – 2 Cor. 10:5

There is no doubt that the internet is changing how we relate and even how we think. Two thought-provoking books on that here and here.

But given that over 500 million people use Facebook (which means if it were a country it would be the 3rd largest in the world!) and given that it is now the default mode of communication for the majority (200 million people check their facebook page once a day).

Facebook

Today I make the case for

Facebook as a Friend – opportunity

How can we use Facebook as a force for good and as a way of building relationships.

1. Use Facebook to keep in touch with one another: students on holiday, moving on with work,  on graduation.
2. Use Facebook to get back in touch with those who you’ve lost contact with. I’ve reconnected with old school friends and university friends many of whom did not know me as a Christian.  One school friend asked for advice on hymns for his wedding as a result of reconnecting.
3. Use Facebook as an extension of face-to-face relationships. As a church for example we tend to meet on one day a week and then only for a few hours. Facebook is a tool through which you can renew and build on relationships.  It is for me as a church pastor a way to carry on conversations in a church and to get to know people a whole lot more quickly than I otherwise could. Don’t use it to create meaningless relationships but build relationships.
4. Use Facebook to take the focus off yourself.  It can be increadibly narcissistic and self-centred and we need to model a good use of the communication tool.  Use Facebook to listen to the needs of others, to promote acts of kindness and love, to encourage others towards faith in Christ. Link to good articles, put up a Bible verse, share how you have been learning in the Christian life.
5. Use Facebook to model a disciplined and creative life. Let those who know you know what you are reading – review what you are reading.
6. Use Facebook to model a critical and reflective life.  How many status updates are opportunities for people to complain about life or criticize others. We can use Facebook status updates to inspire, encourage and cause people to rethink their perspectives.
7. Use Facebook to do evangelism.  Use it as a way to keep in touch with those who have met you somewhere
8. Use Facebook to promote church.  We have a City Church: past and present page to help those who loved their time with us as a church keep in touch. We also use it to encourage existing members to sign up to Church activities or events and then invite their friends.

9.  Use Facebook to build community.  Facebook enables those new to a community to join in at a much earlier stage of relationship. Invitations to the pub after church or to a trip to the cinema are easily circulated. For many new to a city or a church it can be a lonely and isolating experience but new technology can overcome barriers and make it a smoother and simpler process. It can be used for requests for practical help, advice, fun, etc..

10. Use Facebook to research trends & sharpen teaching.  If you’re involved in youth or student ministries use it to find out what others are reading or watching. I now often ask questions on facebook  a few days before preaching to help prepare and engage the congregation for the following Sunday.  This last week I asked ‘what is your favourite opening line of a book?’ and did so because I was starting a new series from  the beginning of Matthew’s gospel.

1. Use Facebook to support church mission partners. Often these are the people who most benefit from new media so share news, pictures, wish them a happy Christmas, etc.

Next time we’ll take a look at some of the dangers in New Media as we look at Facebook: Foe?

This post is a summary of a talk I gave at Avenue Community Church