at the bottom of his heart, in the depths of his soul, there was an empty space

I believe myself that his whole life was a search for God, or, for those who prefer less personal terms, for absolute certainty. Indeed, he had first taken up philosophy in the hope of finding proof of the existence of God… Somewhere at the back of my father’s mind, at the bottom of his heart, in the depths of his soul, there was an empty space that had once been filled by God, and he never found anything else to put it in.

Katherine Tait. My Father Bertrand Russell cited in John Dickson’s If I were God, I’d make myself clearer